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Was listening to an aro/ace friend of ours on a livestream, talking about their dating experiences and how they feel about it, love, and relationships.

And it really just has us questioning our own romantic orientation. But, we've never had a really good idea of what romance actually is. And, past attempts to read up on it have not provided us with any clarity because its definitions were so tied up in cishet-normative relationships. And being queer and polyamorous, that's really not useful to us.

But while we may have no clue about romance, we still have "romantic partners". We refer to them that way because even if we have no idea what romance really is, we still love them in a way to goes beyond the love one may feel for close friends.

Are we aromantic? We don't know. We can't say we're aromantic or alloromantic because we don't really know what romance is. And maybe our autistic brain never well, so who knows?

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Star Ruby System

July 2025

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